Grandma Speed
by andrewd18 (989408)

My grandmother refuses to upgrade to broadband even though it's an extra $5/mo because she's used it at my house and it loads too fast. She says that her internet at home is "perfect Grandma speed", and us "young-uns with fresh brains can handle the zip of that fast stuff."

Peanuts
by pragma_x (644215)

A little slash-trivia here:

You can also notice the refresh of a CRT if you chew on something hard, like peanuts, while staring at the screen. The crushing action of your teeth vibrates your head just enough to interface with the screen's refresh rate, causing the picture to "bounce" and shear in your field of view.

Re:Peanuts
by Hythlodaeus (411441)

The same can be achieved by humming the second F below middle C.

Re:Peanuts
by Rogerborg (306625)

DON'T DO IT; that's the Brown Note [wikipedia.org].

Re:Slaughterhouse Cases
by nospam007 (722110)

>...but do I expect my local PC tech guy to have investigative training? ...

It's so that they can carry a gun before telling you: "I reformatted your harddrive, you have a backup, don't you?"

Re:Ok, first off:
by Anonymous Coward

COO: Chief Operating Officer (usually a doctor)
CTO: Chair Throwing Officer (usually a Ballmer)
EIO: Chief Farming Officer (usually Old McDonald)

Don't cheat the students!
by PCM2 (4486)

America gets a bad enough rap with the state of our education system today. Don't make it worse by leaving our students behind the rest of the world! Where would we be if our students didn't understand the latest developments in trigonometry or first-semester calculus? The changes in Newtonian physics from year to year alone are enough to keep a team of textbook writers employed around the clock.

Yes, and here's why
by freedom_india (780002)

Yes. And you were brought in by a blue stork onto your parents' doorstep from a land far, far beyond, where daisies and lillies grow beautifully well, where dinosaurs and deers ate together at the Golden Pool.
Then one mighty day, Lord the God, finished developing the rest of the real-estate (WoW), and wanted to let Adam & Eve and everyone out to make room for Himself.
However, the Golden Pool and the excellent infrastructure in the Garden of Love were too good to make any of them voluntarily leave.
So the God had to boot Adam & Eve out of the Garden by throwing a snake upon them, which made Eve scream and rush out of the Garden followed by Adam. Eve refused to go back into the Garden when persuaded to do so by Adam and told him he wouldn't get any "dessert" if he did not move out with her.
So Adam had to move out to keep the "desserts" coming.

Re:Awful
by freedom_india (780002)

Mach? What does that mean?

It refers to Gillete MACH 3 Shaving System to shave your #@$$%

Re:Age-controlled vending machines have a place
by greyhueofdoubt (1159527)

>>...stay away from computers to prevent blindness...

Wait, computers make you go blind? I thought the only thing that made you blind was masterb... OOOHHHHH I get it.

Caffeine Theme
by FurtiveGlancer (1274746)

To extend the meme, now I'll start development of C-Objective Kernel Editor (COKE). that will be followed by Linux Apache Tkl/Tcl Extensions (LATTE) which, of course, demands Folding On AMD Machines (FOAM). Sorry, but I'm too tired to come up with an acronym for marshmallows. ~

Which Al-Qaeda?
by Swampash (1131503)

I'm confused. Is this new decentralised online digital five-nines 256-symmetric multimedia Al Qaeda the same bunch of guys who are starving, cut off from support, and cowering in fear for their lives in caves?

Just wondering.

Last day, huh?
by Foddz (1181575)

Please tell me they're giving him the high tech 'security walk'!

Re:Accountability
by CauseWithoutARebel (1312969)

It is available, but it is obtuse. A nice place to find such information is OpenSecrets.org [opensecrets.org]

And the accountability? It's with you. With me. With our neighbors and fellow slashdotters. We are a Democratic Republic, we are supposed to keep our elected officials in check by removing them or not re-electing them when they become corrupt or simply stop representing our interests, which means one of two things is in play here:

1) The American people, generally, support wiretapping without oversight and don't want to see telecoms punished even if their support of the program was illegal

or, more likely:

2) The American people do not fully educate themselves on these sorts of matters and don't have a full grasp of the implications involved in allowing it. They have abdicated their responsibility of oversight of the government.

So if McDonald's wanted a TLD...
by oodaloop (1229816)

...then ICANN has .chzbrgr?

I'm sorry, I'll show myself out now.

Indubitably
by JoshOOOWAH (849135)

My karma's gone way up ever since I started outsourcing my comments.

Re:Indubitably
by Dachannien (617929)

Dear Sir,

We will have your obligatory Futurama reference done by next Tuesday. Please transfer the funds to the aforementioned offshore bank account.

Re:WTF indeed
by eggoeater (704775)

"WTFey"

I hadn't seen WTF adjective-ised before, but I love it... there's just so much I can use it with. In fact, I gotta go now and tell my boss how my project is going....